Parentings No Joke
by Captain Cosmic
Summary: When the class is assigned to take care of plastic baby dolls, Danny, Tucker, and Sam, learn about the trouble that comes with raising a fake child.
1. Adopting

"As you all know today is the day I will be assigning the groups for your parenting projects." Mr. Salamen said.

"Please do not complain about whatever partner I give you as these groups are final."

After taking out his glasses and a piece of paper, Mr. Salamen began naming the groups. After a few he reached the trio.

"Daniel and Samantha."

Tucker smirked as the two blushed, avoiding each others gaze.

"Tucker and Valerie."

"Yes!" Tucker exclaimed while Valerie sighed.

After finishing reading the last few names on the list, Mr. Salamen took a box filled with plastic babies out of a nearby cabinet and placed them on his desk.

"Mothers please come up and get your babies." And With that the girls crowded around the box picking out their newly born projects.

"And remember, when it cries you must cradle it until it is calm within the thirty seconds, every time you fail to do so will be recorded by the device inside and will result in a loss of points as well as any physical damage to the doll itself. Also it is up to you to decide the name and gender of your child."

Sam sat down beside Danny with their plastic child.

"I think we should name him Vincent," Danny said as he stared at the doll.

"HER name is Charlotte," Sam said in a you have no say kind of tone.

"Who said it was a girl?"

"Who said it was a boy?"

"Rock paper scissors Danny said quickly.

"Your on," Sam said as the two began playing. Danny groned as sam won all three rounds, she smiled victoriously as she held up the doll.

"Charlotte it is!' She said probably.

* * *

Later, after school...

"Don't just shove it in there like that!" Sam exclaimed as she watched Danny force the doll into his backpack.

"What its not like its real," Danny said defensively as Sam snatched it out of his hands.

"Don't listen to him Charlotte, Daddies just an idiot," Sam said in a motherly tone as she gently placed the baby into her backpack, its head sticking out of it.

Danny raised an eyebrow. "Your taking this way too seriously,"

"Guys check it out!" Tucker exclaimed as he walked up to the two holding his own doll, an irritated Valerie behind him.

"Say hello to the awsome Tucker Jr!" Tucker said proudly.

"Uh Tuck what happened to his eye?" Danny asked as he stared at the one eyed doll.

"What are you..OH MY GOD!" Tucker yelled as he noticed the missing eye.

"Everyone out of the way my babies injured!" Tucker yelled as began to crawl on the ground to search for the plastic eye.

Valerie put a hand on her forehead. "I have to spend the entire week with this," She said as she followed the panicking techgeek.

"Looks like Tucker doesn't know how to keep an EYE on his Babie," Danny said with a smirk.

Sam glanced at him emotionlessly "Please don't influence the baby with bad humor," She said as she began to walk off.

"What, you don't get it?" He said as he ran to catch up with her.

* * *

Later, on the walk to Danny's house...

"Man this sucks, Valerie said she doesn't trust me with the baby," Tucker said.

"I can't imagine why," Sam said sarcastically.

"I swear I looked everywhere," Tucker said.

The three reached Danny's home and walked inside to find Jazz reading a book on the living room sofa.

"Whats with the doll?" Jazz asked as she noticed the portuding head from Sam's backpack.

"These two had a babie," Tucker said with a smirk earning himself a kick from a blushing Sam.

"It's for a school project," Danny said.

"Aww, whats it's name?" Jazz asked.

"Charlotte," Sam said proudly.

"Whos having a baby?" Jack said nervously as he ran into the room.

"Relax dad its for a school project," Jazz said.

Jack let out a sigh of relief and chuckled. "For a minute there I thought letting Sam sleep over so often-"

"Dad!' Danny shouted in disgust while Sam turned red and Tucker bursted out laughing, Jazz put her head in her hands.

"What? I'm just saying, me and your mother started off as friends before-"

"Okay thats enough, we have homework," Danny said as he grabbed Sam and Tucker's arms and lead them upstaiirs, Sam now bright red and Tucker growing red from laughing so hard.

* * *

Later that day...

After Sam left for a denstist appointment, Danny and Tucker began playing Doomed 3 when the doll began crying.

"Dude your baby wants you, Tucker said from his playing position on a guest bed.

"Pass it to me," Danny said, his eyes never looking away from the screen.

"You sure dude?" Tucker asked as he picked up the doll that layed beside him.

"Yea relax I'll catch it," Danny said reassuringly.

"Alright here," Tucker said as he tossed the doll to Danny.

"We reached level twenty!" Danny exclaimed excitedly, putting his hands in the air and not noticing the doll fly out of the open window beside him.

"Sam's gonna kill me..."

"Dude, you'd make a terrible father," Tucker said bluntly.


	2. Consequence

"There, it's not so bad," Danny said confidently as he finished taping up the battered doll.

"If by not so bad you mean it couldn't look any worse than yes," Tucker said.

"You could be a little more optimistic," Danny said.

"Danny Sam's here!" Maddie yelled from downstairs.

"Good luck," Tucker said as he was about to leave the room, Danny grabbing him by the back of his shirt.

"No way, your just as responsable as I am," Danny said as he shoved the doll into Tucker's arms.

"Are you kidding me, you told me to throw it to you!" Tucker said as he shoved it back.

"And you should have known bett-" Before Danny could finish his bedroom door knob turned and Danny quickly hid the doll behind his back. Sam casually stepped in, curiously analyzing the nervous expressions on her best friends faces.

"Why do you guys looked so freaked out?" Sam asked.

"Tucker was just telling me about his foot fungus," Danny said, hoping Sam wouldn't see through his lie.

"Hey, I don't have-" Tucker stopped as he felt a sharp kick to his right leg.

"Uh gross, so wheres Charlotte?" Sam asked, noticing Danny turn a little pale at the question.

"She's uh fine..." Sam turned from curious to suspicious.

"Danny, wheres our baby?" Sam asked with a piercing stare.

"It's actually kind of a funny story, right Tucker?" He turned to find he and Sam were now the only ones in the room.

"Coward," Danny whispered under his breath.

"Danny, What did you do to our baby?" Sam asked, Danny knew he couldn't lie his way out of it.

Danny took in a deep breath, hoping it wouldn't be his last.

"She kind of fell."

"You dropped her?"

"Something like that."

"Show her to me."

"But-"

"NOW"

Sam's jaw dropped as she stared at the mummified looking doll in front of her. Her hands turned to fists.

"I know it looks bad but..."

* * *

Meanwhile, outside...

Tucker winced as he heard Sam's screams and curses from outiside of the Fenton home. He kept running without looking back.

* * *

The next day, inside of Casper High School...

"Come on Sam, you can't just not talk to me forever," Danny pleaded as Sam shut her locker and walked away without uttering a word.

Danny sighed.

"Hey dude check it out,"

Danny turned to find Tucker holding his plastic baby doll, although now it wore a pirate hat and had an eyepatch around its missing eye.

"You think Salamens not gonna notice it's missing an eye just caused you dressed it like a pirate?" Danny asked.

"Well at least my baby doesn't look like a mummy," Tucker said as he glanced at the taped up baby head stiking out of Danny's backpack.

"Maybe if you had better aim," Danny scowled.

"Maybe if you had better fatherly skills," Tucker retorted.

They stopped arguing at the sound of the lunch bell.

"Yes, I'm starving," Tucker said.

"When are you not starving," Danny said as the two made their way to lunch.

"When I'm eating," Tucker replied.

* * *

Later, at lunch...

"Tucker can you please tell Sam that I'm sorry for the hundreth time," Danny said.

"Tucker can you please tell Danny that sorry won't bring our baby back to life," Sam said.

"Tucker can you please tell Sam that I worked hard to fix our project."

"Tucker can you please tell Danny to take that mummified monster and shove it up-"

"Enough!" Tucker shouted as he slapped his meatball grinder back onto his plate.

"I can't enjoy my lunch with all this fighting!"

"Sam can you please just talk to Danny already!"

"I see no reason to talk to a baby killer," Sam said.

"It was never alive!" Danny shouted.

"It was alive until it fell out of a window!" Sam replied furiously.

Tucker slapped his head onto the lunch table, it was going to be a long day...

* * *

Later, in English class...

"Sam..." Danny whispered to the angry goth he sat beside. She ignored his whisper.

"Sam..."

"Sam..."

Suddenly a paper ball impacted the back of her head.

"What?" Sam whispered back in anger.

"Look," Danny said as he pulled a new looking doll out of his backpack.

"How did you?"

"I'll explain later," Danny said.

* * *

Flashback to three minutes ago...

"What did you do to it?" Paulina screamed in anger as Dash held the mummified doll.

"I swear I didn't do anything Paulina this isn't our baby!" Dash exclaimed.

"I swear to God Dash this is the last time I work with you on anything!" Paulina yelled as she stormed off.

* * *

Back to the present time...

"Is this how you would treat your own son Mr. Baxter?" Mr Salamen asked angrily.

"I'm telling you it's not mine!" Dash exclaimed as he waved the tape covered doll, it's arm coming off in the process. The classroom was now filled with laughter.

"Don't you think this is a little harsh," Sam whispered to a smirking Danny.

"No, harsh was when he pushed me into the girls locker room last week, this is payback with benefits," Danny said as he leant back in his chair.

"Thats an F Mr. Baxter now please sit down," Mr. Slamen said as he placed the baby onto his desk. A frustrated Dash stormed back to his seat.

* * *

Later, after school...

"Ah, revenge is sweet," Danny said as the three walked to his house.

"The look on Dash's face was priceless," Tucker said with a smile.

"It was pretty funny seeing Paulina get a detention for cursing at him in spanish," Sam said.

"Hey, race you guys home, loser buys pizza," Danny said.

Soon the three were racing down the sidewalk, Danny in the lead with Sam catching up and Tucker close behind her.

"Danny look out for that-" Before Tucker could finish Danny had tripped over a large crack in the sidewalk, his backpack flying off of his shoulder and onto the street.

The three watched in horror as several cars ran over it.

"Please tell me the baby wasn't in your backpack."

Danny glanced over at Tucker who was already half way down the block.

Danny stared up at Sam.

"Five second head start?"

"Three."

"Fair enough," Danny said as he began running off, three seconds later Sam was close behind him.


End file.
